Do you feel like you always have a constant dialogue going on in your head? Maybe of conversations you’ve had earlier on in the day, your never ending to do list, or perhaps your inner critic giving you dialogue of what you should change and do better. This is completely normal and happens to all of us.
But, when we learn to get quiet with ourselves we can reveal things that we didn’t know we even needed, wanted or desired.
I mention this a lot when I talk about journaling. To journal effectively we first need to get quiet with ourselves. If you journal and find yourself only writing down the “surface level” stuff like what’s going on in your life externally and how you feel about things, then you’re not delving deep enough into your heart centre and discovering a deeper connection with yourself.
Journaling effectively is like having a really deep conversation with somebody. What’s ACTUALLY going on for me? What’s REALLY going on inside me?
Even when it’s not quiet in your house, you may have young kids or have a busy hectic day to day life, you can still learn to be quiet with yourself by following my easy 5 step technique below.
But first, what does getting quiet with yourself actually mean?
It means being able to stop your internal noise, drop into your body and really tune into what’s going on inside. So you can channel your energy and shift your focus from taking in all the external information available to you.
Follow these 5 simple steps to help you to get quiet with yourself:
Close your eyes, look down or focus on a small object in front of you.
Place your hand on your heart and take a few deep breaths.
On the exhales focus on dropping your shoulders and dropping down into your body. You’ll notice you’ll start to slow down.
Allow your thoughts to go in and out without any judgement. Don’t tell yourself you have to relax. Visualise your heart space. Perhaps you can assign it a colour or a metaphor. Then just listen. Don’t plant thoughts in your mind.
Ask your heart space a question: What is it that I need today? What do I need to connect with today?
It may take a while to get the hang of it - the more you practice the easier it’ll become.
Once you’ve taken the time to get quiet with yourself you may like to begin your journaling. Or if you’d like you can just sit with it and process what comes up for you without journaling on it.
If there is something that comes up for you which feels impossible to achieve, ie. You need more space today but you have two young children to look after and getting any time to yourself seems near to impossible, think about how you can achieve just a small percentage of what you need.
In the case of needing more space, this may look like standing out in the garden for 5 minutes, scheduling a 10 minute walk or going to bed earlier so you can get up earlier to have some time on your own.
Give yourself permission to want the things that you want. If you’re struggling to find the time to get quiet with yourself, it’s important to remember we will never be handed the time in an envelope. As women we need to claim that time and make it a priority for ourselves. The more we act and honour what we need the easier it becomes.